[OPINION] An Informal Appraisal Of Biafra And The N5000 To The Jobless By Modiu Olaguro

Biafra
The Biafran agitators and their supporters lay claim to the inalienable rights of man to self-determination as a basis for their protests for sovereignty.

What they have not done is to remind themselves of an inalienable right that a nation has to crackdown on civil disorder, public disorder and public disturbance.

I am no student of law nor international politics (relation) but I’m not stupid not to know that the UN has a template for any persons that desire to remove itself from another.

The Catalans’ of Spain did not block the roads to the Bernabeu–thats why we still see CR7 on weekends. The clamor for Scottish independence has been on for ages, claiming the life of William Wallace of yore. It reared its head recently albeit in a civil manner.

Because the Scottish agitators behaved sanely, the UK addressed the issue professionally–calling for a referendum.

And you know what? Their people voted in support of the UK.

This is a lesson for our Igbo freedom fighters.

Stage your protest without blocking roads.

Occupy all of the Igbo nation but don’t occupy the banks.

Chant “long live Ojukwu” (Remember, he’s dead), not “Buhari must die.”

This is 21st century, fight not the 12th century way.

Channel your energies to having a referendum; abi una dey fear?

The occupation of highways while protesting is a VALID invitation to police brutality; we’ve got so many brute in that force.

When you cause public disorder in the name of Biafra on Nigerian soil, Buhari will be justified to use force to tame you guys.

Personally, I can’t wait for an Igbo-less Nigeria. Please, you guys should speed up the paperwork.

Andy Uba should be good as the first Bianfran president.

Anyim Pius Anyim will be OK as the prime minister.

Reverend King as the president of CAB (Christian Association of Biafra) will be a blessing.

Okonjo Iweala will make your economy grow faster than that of the US.

With Stella Oduah as your first female governor, your days of worry is over.

Sullivan Chime will do well to curtail human rights abuses as an Attorney General and Justice Minister.

So much to die for for one’s land! Or is the political displacement of these people not
the stick beating the drum?
……

What about the N5000?

Katy Perry made $135m in 12 months. She neither lifted logs nor tilled the soil.

The American never won an election. Even if she did, she could never earn that much unless she’s a Nigerian politician (Obama is a pauper in terms of earning power).

All she did was to use her head to write and tongue to sing; then expose some of her endowments after embarking on some tours.

So many Nigerian Katy hawking moi-moi in Benue!

So much Katy in the church choir where they will remain till the angel of death pay them a visit.

All over the nation, our own $135m earners will die without making their money. They will neither make it in real nor in virtual terms.

Who knows whether I was meant to be Katy’s male version?

I’ve listened to several inaugural addresses of several American presidents and all of them attribute the success of Americans to one thing: “America.” America they meant, a land that gives EVERYONE equal opportunity to do ANYTHING and EVERYTHING.

Continue salivating on the N5000 the shallow President Buhari and his superficial vice promised you as a potentially jobless graduate.

Katy is only 31. No government gave her N5000.

Its as if the black race is doomed. What the hell is wrong with us?

Modiu Olaguro, a corps member teaches Mathematics at Jebba.
Email: [email protected]
Twitter: @ModiuOlaguro

2 COMMENTS

  1. U dat spent ur tym ryt in dis. Wia u told dat katty also rot tinx lik dis nd made $135m in 12 mths?. Mi dear, wo so eva u are I advice u to get a life and live ok. Wo even told u dat d biafrans want Nigeria talk less of Nigeria wit Ibos. I biliv in BIAFRA 100%.