In early stages of relationships everyone begins by listening to the other person; we receive their messages and hear their conversations in the context they passed across the message, not how we chose to see things or how we want them to say it. Doing that, we always got to see from their point of view, and could always relate with them, and where they were coming from.


Communication is conveying a message from the heart of the giver and received in the right context by the heart of the receiver. Misunderstandings are as a result of miscommunications. Have you ever heard, ‘you’re misunderstanding me,’ ‘oh well we are saying the same things just in different ways.’

Well if we are saying the same things then how come our hearts aren’t on the same rhythm?


At the very beginnings of relationships our communications skills were excellent, we got along. That was because we weren’t as interested in passing our opinion as we were trying to know what the other was passing across. We didn’t have much of an opinion as learning, knowing and relating to the behavior of the other.


Somehow, we missed it as time went by, why? Familiarity! We became familiar with the other person. Through quarrels and disagreements we think we are now able to predict, think ahead, what the other would do or say, and so we become biased to messages the other may pass or be passing across.


Folu Popoola

Twitter: @lifekulture