Take a moment to rank your self-assurance right now. 10 is very confident (you speak your point of view; you offer your perspective in group settings; you form conclusions quickly without second-guessing) and zero is low or no self-assurance (you hold your thoughts and remarks back because you believe no one wishes to listen to them; you are unable to make up your mind; you are not able to make a decision without wanting to ask at least three people their opinions).Does your response surprise you? What if you and four friends each ranked yourselves, then tried to guess how others ranked themselves. Do you think you’d be close in your guess?
Here are three steps you can take today to improve your self-confidence.
Step 1: Name the emotion initially triggered as soon as you are in a heightened stress state. For example, say you are in the office and somebody else takes credit for a task you finished. What did you feel? Was it doubt? Worry? Rage? Disappointment? No matter what it is, simply acknowledge it. Don’t judge yourself for feeling it. That’s what we do as human beings; we feel! So go ahead and experience the emotion being triggered. By feeling the emotion, your self-confidence is raised due to having new found knowledge … and knowledge is empowering!
Step 2: Step up your emotion. If you are feeling rage, then look to raise your emotion to anger; if you feel doubt, then elevate your emotion to disappointment; if it’s worry, then move up your emotion to doubt. The secret is to elevate your emotion so that you can begin to notice a new perspective on the circumstance. With a new perspective, you are open to boosting your confidence regardless of how anyone else responds to the situation. Everything You Need To Know About Stress
Step 3: Execute! There are two parts to this step. First, you must execute the inferior emotion and elevate the inferior emotion. Then you must take action or execute the step(s) necessary to reinforce your self-confidence. Take at least one step to resolve the situation that is triggering your stress. Going back to our illustration of someone taking the credit for your job well done, a good action might be to approach the person who got the recognition and congratulate her on her victory while making sure to give yourself a pat on the back for taking the high road.
Out of self-confidence grows assurance and resilience. With every stride you take, the greater your resilience grows.