Relationship Advice For You: Is It Love Or Lust?

Does he love you or is he lusting after you? Does he really want to know you: your thoughts, your dreams, and your fears? Or is it all for the physical?

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If he’s showing obvious signs that he only wants the cookie, the fruit, the flower or whatever reference you have for your nature below, then maybe it’s time to – LET HIM GO!

Is he really worth you wasting your time or more importantly your faith? I think not. No one is worth losing your faith in God – yes I said it, no one.

Now I know this is easier said than done especially if you have already developed strong feelings for him – possibly even love, but as hard as it may be now to walk away if you have to, it may be even harder later when even more feelings are developed on your end and or if his pressure towards you to give in to sex increases.

Because if he is only in the relationship to get in your pants one of two things is guaranteed to happen in my opinion:

(a) he will throw in the towel early and move on to the next woman or

(b) he is going to stay around as long as possible to break you – you will become his challenge, his conquest.

And is this really what you want? For him to tell you all the right things to get you weak, vulnerable and right where he wants you only to win the prize and walk away leaving you broken hearted and guilty for giving in.

Maybe that isn’t your situation, perhaps your man does love you, but he doesn’t share your faith and values, having sex out of wedlock is one compromise – what about the others ahead while you both are unevenly yoked?

Your faith in God should be a lifestyle and if your man doesn’t share that cutting ties now may be easier than having to do it later.

If you find or have a man that desires to know you beyond the physical and can honestly respect your decision to honor your desire to abstain from sex until marriage then maybe this guy is worth holding onto for the walk down the aisle.

He can possibly be the one that loves you. If God can give women the desire to uphold His word about abstaining from sex until marriage then, He has also given it to men.

Not all men are running around trying to have sex any chance they get, men can honor God too. And to find a man after God’s heart is a great thing!

This type of man will honor you because he honors God. So don’t lose hope if you haven’t found this man yet, surrender your list of what you desire of a husband and allow God to intervene as you obediently prepare yourself for your mate.

Because to be honest, finding a husband is one step – keeping him and having a successful marriage is a WHOLE different ball game which you need to be prepared for.

So while you are dating – date with a purpose.

Khara Campbell is a mother and wife. She blogs about faith, parenting, marriage, fashion and her Bahamian heritage.

2 Comments

  • Hi. Am linda.pls help… My ex and i broke up 7 months ago though 2 monhs after the brk up we both have bn telling each other “i miss u”and quarrel again on phone.the problem was i was stil holding on to wat he did a yr ago in the rlship,like i kept bringing up d past then after a month which is d 3rd month after receiving a txt msg from him saying “i miss u so much”i replied him “i miss u too i love u and want u back”he didnt rely didnt say anytin i waitd 2 weeks no msg from him then i accepted a guy who was interestd in me.the following month my ex sent me a msg saying he misses me nd want me back but dat was almost a month i sent him dat msg,so i was pissd angry at him nd spoke badly at him.dat was because he had to wait dat long to reply me.according to him d way i spoke to him he didnt knw i stil care or love him and askd a female friend of his to be his girlfriend.this is 4 months after am no longer wit d guy i was dating and wit someone new but i havnt stopd loving my Ex. I chatted wit him yestrdy told him i miss him nd he replied me”i hate to admit but i really miss u.i was thinking about you recently”.i askd if he’s happy he said he isnt,i also askd abt his girlfriend he said”its complicated”. Pls what should i do i really miss him nd i stil love him.can i stil get him back? Do u tink him knwing am in a rlship can stop him from making a move if he want to?

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