There is power in the tongue. Through your words, you have the power to build your husband up, but you also have the power to tear him down. I’ve seen plenty of women talk themselves right out of a good husband or boyfriend. Check out these five ways that your mouth can seriously change your relationship status from married to single. And don’t worry fellas, we have five ways you can talk yourself right out of a good wife coming soon.
1. Negative Self Talk – Have you ever talked yourself right into a bad attitude. Walking around the house finding things to be negative about. You’re having this whole negative conversation in your head about what you are going to tell your husband and how you are going to get him back. You’ve replayed the entire conversation in your head over and over. And when you finally see him, you unleash your wrath.
Tip: Instead of replaying the negativity over and over again in your head, take some time to think about what you really want to say to your husband and then begin to plan how and when you are going to communicate it in a loving manner.
2. Confiding in the Opposite Sex – I’m not saying that you can’t have friends and confidants of the opposite sex. But you definitely need to protect your heart and mind against emotional affairs that can and do lead to physical affairs. Please have some discernment about who you choose to discuss your marriage with. Sometimes what starts off as innocent can lead you down a path of destruction.
Tip: If you need someone to confide in, start with friends and family that support your marriage. And if they are not available, find a mentor at church or a trained professional.
3. Being Disrespectful to Your Husband – Leroy Scott, LPC, says: “A man would rather have his wife respect him every day than to simply say the words “I love you” every day. Respect is equated to love.” If you are being disrespectful to your spouse in not only what you say to him, but how you say it, then you might be sending a message that you don’t love him. Once you put it out there, you may be able to apologize…but you will never be able to take it back completely.
Tip: We’re not saying you don’t have a right to address issues or wrong-doings. However, we would like for you to address them in a loving way. Try to be encouraging and solution focused when you are dealing with issues with your spouse.
4. Talking Negatively about Your Spouse to your family and friends – If you are always talking negative about your husband to your family and friends, please don’t be surprised if they don’t like him. After all, you have shaped their opinion of him. So don’t get mad when they tell you to leave him when you are going through a rough spell in your marriage. They love you and they don’t want you staying with someone with no redeeming qualities…right.
Tip: Don’t talk negatively about your husband, ever. You’re a team and teammates just don’t do that. There’s a difference between going to a trusted confidant to share some marital concerns and flat out talking negatively about your husband.
5. Declaring What You “Ain’t Gon’ Do” – marriage requires sacrifice and compromise. Every wife comes into a marriage with certain expectations and ideas of how things are going to be. But so do husbands. You must be careful with your expectations, so they don’t become serious issues or somehow become a threat to your relationship.
Tip: Practice being flexible in your relationship. If you are always getting your way, then make it a point to check in with your husband to make sure his needs are being met.