Even if it was a nasty breakup, in order to open a new door, you must first close that pesky one you’re leaving behind. This is one of the most difficult steps in the breakup process, and it can take quite a bit of time.
If you are having trouble getting closure after a breakup, consider what is stopping you. For example, if he cheated on you, and you didn’t even know, you may be more upset that you didn’t know what was happening rather than the fact that you were betrayed.
Whatever the situation, it is important to understand that what is done is done. Remove all reminders of him from your life. Take those pictures off of your Instagram, unfriend him on Facebook (for now is fine, maybe later you can be friends again), and erase his number from your phone. By doing this, you will physically (and electronically) remove him from your life. It will get you one step closer to the closure you need.
#2) Understand Why It Ended
If there seems to be no rhyme or reason to the recent decision of breaking up, consider what the underlying factors may have been. Forget, for just a moment, that he is a sleaze bag, and see if you can find some warning signs that the end was near.
Very rarely a breakup is one-sided. Oftentimes, both partners have a role in the end of a relationship. Figure out where he went wrong and where you went wrong. Look back and see if you can see the warning signs.
White it isn’t a good idea to look back for too long, thinking critically about your relationship will help you figure out how to be a better girlfriend in your next relationship, and help you decide what kind of boyfriend you really want. The most important part of this step, however, is that it will help you see red flags in your future relationships.
#3) Boost Your Confidence
While exploring where you went wrong shouldn’t be an exercise in beating yourself up, it is important to boost your confidence after you realize there are some things you want to change about yourself.
How do you boost your confidence? Well, call up your support team and get a little pep talk (or ten). Realize that this breakup is no reflection of how your future relationships will be. Remind yourself that you are worthy of a good man.
Never let what he said wound you. No matter how intense your breakup was, do not allow his words to control your current actions. Discover your true nature by exploring what you’ve done right in all of your relationships.
#4) Figure Out What You Want
It is not wise to jump into a new relationship while you’re still coping with the end of your last relationship. Take some time to understand yourself and how you function. Think about what you need in a man and what you want in a relationship.
Go ahead and make a list for yourself. This will help you find the right guy for you the next time around.
Remember, you don’t want your relationship history to repeat itself, so be sure to consider all of the rights and wrongs of both partners in your last relationship.
#5) Girl’s Night Out
Okay, you’ve worked through everything from your last relationship in your head. You know what you are looking for in your next relationship. It’s time to blow off some steam.
Call up your favorite girls and go get some drinks.
This isn’t the time to go shopping for your next relationship, but a little flirting will help you boost your confidence.
The most important part of the girl’s night out is that you enjoy yourself. You’ve gotten your closure, so start peeking through the new doors that you can open. Have fun! Let loose! It’s your night!