We are halfway through the year and everyone around me is assessing their personal goals and determining what’s next as they plan for the remainder of the year. I get it because I am busy doing the same.
But while stressing over my health and business goals I realized that I was actually leaving out a very important thing; assessing my marriage and family goals.
When the year started, my husband and I sat down and discussed our family goals as well as goals for our marriage. We walked into the year with major expectations. And although making those plans was great, life happened and we are coming up short in a few areas. Some areas are more important than others, but to achieve what we set out to achieve this year, it’s time to sit down and have another family planning meeting.
So what’s so important that we need to have a meeting about it? A Lot, really. The year flies by and if we don’t make a plan, we are in for some trouble. So, in an effort to end 2015 on a great note, here are a few conversations I think every couple should have soon. The sooner you discuss these items, the better off your family and your marriage will be.
1. Financial Goals.
This is an opportunity to discuss issues like debt, savings, changes in income, home improvements, unexpected expenses that took place in the last six months, and new expenses you may be anticipating for the next six months. It’s also a great time to reevaluate your household budget and set aside a budget for any upcoming birthdays, as well as the holidays.
2. Date Nights.
I know this may not seem major, but it’s an important part of building a healthy and happy marriage. If you and your spouse have failed to go on dates this year (or you have gone on very few), have a conversation about why that is and try to set a schedule you can stick to. Even if your budget doesn’t allow for trips or fancy dinners, think of simple date nights you can have right at home.
3. Career/Business Plans.
Use this time of the year to discuss how you each feel about your professional paths (this conversation may not be necessary if you work on a business together and you already discuss this often). If you have a specific goal in mind for 2016 (like going back to school or switching careers) bring it up now. Telling your spouse what’s on your mind allows both of you to make adjustments and plan for changes ahead.
4. Health Assessment.
I know a lot of people avoid this conversation, but talk about where you each are in terms of your current health, as well as any health goals you may have. Also discuss ways to support each other. Conversations like this can help make goals more attainable and can also give you some perspective on why your spouse might be struggling with reaching a certain goal.
5. Your Children.
Take an opportunity to discuss any concerns you make have about your kids. Any worries about their academic progress that you failed to address? What about health issues that need to be discussed? Any concerns about their behavior? Sure, parents typically discuss these issues as they come up, but occasionally things are left unsaid and this may be a good time to have a chat about those things, even if they seem small.
6. Your Overall Marriage.
If you know your marriage isn’t in a great place, don’t ignore things. Have an honest discussion about your concerns without pointing any fingers. Focus on how YOU are feeling and suggest things that you think may help your marriage get back on track. Couples often suffer in silence for far too long before they get the help that their marriages really need.