Your needs get simpler as your life becomes more complicated.
Things are different in your 30s.
If you’re a twenty-something, that might be hard to imagine from where you’re standing. But think about what you wanted out of life ten years ago. Was it absolutely ridiculous?
Thirty years old versus twenty is like twenty versus 10: to a person in their 30s, a twenty-something is essentially a child.
I’m going to take a wild guess that what you wanted out of a relationship when you were 10 was entirely informed by Disney movies. Do you still see Beauty and the Beast as a sweet, romantic story, or the creepy tale of Stockholm Syndrome that it actually is?
How will your perspective on love change in 10 more years? I’ll tell you how:
1. Your sense of entertainment
20s: You want someone to go to the movies with.
30s: You want someone who will pause Netflix when you pass out, instead of letting it run through three more episodes.
2. Having a romantic dinner date
20s: You want to have a romantic, candlelight dinner.
30s: You want someone who’s not ashamed to eat Chinese in your sweatpants 4 nights in a row, and will tell NO ONE.
3. Getting it on
20s: You want someone who will rock your world in the bedroom all night long.
30s: You want someone who will just hurry up and do that thing you like already because we have work in the morning, damnit.
4. Intimate moments
20s: You want someone who holds your hand as you walk down the street together.
30s: You want someone who’s secure enough to hold your purse when you need to change shoes.
5. Romantic expectations
20s: You want someone who gives you butterflies in your stomach when you lock eyes with them.
30s: You want someone who gets butterflies WITH you when the appetizers arrive at the table.
6. Personal upkeep
20s: You want someone to get all dolled up for.
30s: You want someone who will accept the fact that you’re not going to be dolled up 98 percent of the time.
7. Dependency and conflict resolution
20s: You want someone to lean on when you’re upset.
30s: You want someone who, in the same situation, will simply pour you a glass of wine, put on The Notebook, and go hang out in another room.
8. Your outlook on life
20s: You want someone to travel the world and go on adventures with.
30s: You want someone who can turn people-watching at Walmart into a grand adventure.