The Complete guide to Being Pregnant the Nollywood Way

No matter how much you claim to hate Nollywood movies, everyone indulges in them every once in awhile. The fact that you can’t watch a Nollywood movie in secrecy is one unique thing about them. There is something so unique about the volume of their movie. As soon as you step into a house where they’re seeing a Nollywood movie, you don’t need a priest to come tell you that’s what they seeing. If you have seen one recently, then someone must have pregnant in it but if you missed the details, INFORMATION NIGERIA, in this hilarious piece brings you the complete guide to being pregnant the Nollywood style…

 

When you have no idea  your pregnant but your ‘oversabi’ neigbour already noticed and has gone to tell your mother

 

When you start to experience the early morning vomit and you must dash out of the house passing all the toilets and sinks in the house to go throw up in the flower outside

And the pregnancy must belong to that person your parents don’t want you to marry

And when your mom finally notices  your pregnancy, the first thing she must do is take of her head-tie, tie it on her waste and tell you how you have killed her

 

But when your married, the pregnancy test result must be in a brown envelope and you must give it to your husband when he comes back from work

And your husband must open the envelope read it like an offer letter, fling it away, hug you so tight, lift you up and spin you around

 

But when you are not married and you go inform your boyfriend you haven’t seen your period for two months, the guy must ask you to go find the period where you hid it

And when you finally have the baby

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