A marriage is between TWO people that desire to be wanted and needed and does not include your parents, friends, co-workers, and so on. Just you two. Please know that the friend that is always ready to listen could possibly leave you single once they find love. And if that friendship happens to end, you wouldn’t want your ‘dirty laundry’ appearing on Twitter or Facebook during a spiteful rant. If you absolutely need to involve someone, find a licensed marital counselor in your area. They are sworn by law to keep what is discussed private and confidential.
tips to help your marriage grow include:
1. Remove your emotions from the situation; this allows for clarity and lessens moments of anger and rage.
2. Hear what your spouse has to say in response to what you said or did, regardless of your original intent; whether you agree with them or not, their feelings were affected in some way.
3. Repeat what they said to show that you were listening.
4. Try to understand them and accept them for who and where they are in life; remember you were raised in two completely different households, have varying experiences, and definitions of what marriage is or should be.
5. Support each other when changes need to occur; growth hurts.
6. Stop demanding things of one another, start asking; demands are draining but asking allows for a conversation.
7. Write down what you expect in your marriage, share it with your spouse, talk it out; unspoken expectations (I’ll share more on this later) have ruined many a marriages.
8. Determine what expectations can be realistically incorporated into your day-to-day lives.