Ask Jay: I’m Ready to Marry But I Keep Getting Deceived By Girls. What Should I Do?

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Dear Jay,

I’m a mature man, old enough to get married and I have been trying to get a wife but my girlfriends have not been honest. After dating a girl for a long time, I found out that she was married and separated from her husband and she wasn’t planning to tell me.
I am dating a girl now and I haven’t seen her for about a year, she’s always giving me excuses that she can not come to see me because she is far from me and even when I travel to see her, she still won’t come but she insists that she loves me and that I should go visit her family and do the necessary things.
I am ready to marry but how will I marry someone I don’t spend time with? Please help me and tell me what to do.


Dear F.A
It can be very painful to be constantly betrayed by people you love. Unfortunately, there are a lot of desperate people out there who are willing to hide their true selves just to get married.
As for the person you’re with now, don’t allow her to waste your time, she’s not serious. No woman who truly loves you will avoid seeing you when she has the chance.
I also suggest that you be patient, the right woman will come, just have faith. I hope this was helpful. I wish you the very best.



If you have a dilemma and you’d like to share, send an email to ‘Jola Sotubo on

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