Mary Crumpton is 44-years-old. She used to be a teacher, but now works as a therapist. She’s married, lives in the UK, and – on the surface – appears to live a very normal life.However, what a lot of people don’t know is that Crumpton doesn’t just have a husband. She also has a fiancé. And two boyfriends. And somehow they all get along.
“I was brought up in quite a traditional home,” she says. “In my twenties I got married and settled down in Chorlton fully intending to be with my husband for life.”But it didn’t last.”I did sometimes have feelings for other people, but I felt guilty about doing so and just took it as a sign that I didn’t love my husband enough.
In fact, Crumpton continued with her monogamous lifestyle until she was 29-years-old – at which point she met somebody who changed her mind.”The idea that loving more than one person might not make me a terrible human being only dawned on me when, at a pub, I bumped into a person who had more than one partner. I had never come across it before, or the term ‘polyamory’ which means ‘more-than-one love’. I was quite shocked, and curious about how it all worked for them.
“My partner was with me when I met the polyamorous person, and he was curious about it too. At the time neither of us considered it for ourselves, but I think the seed had been planted.”Shortly after, she suggested to her partner that they try an open relationship, and both of them found someone else almost immediately.
“I married one of the people I first dated polyamorously. My husband, Tim, who is 43, and I got together in 2004 and were married in 2013 at Manchester Museum under the Tyrannosaurus Rex,” she explains. “I have a partner, John, 53, who I have been with since 2011, and who I am planning to ‘marry’ this year. We can’t legally marry, but we are having a full wedding-style commitment ceremony.”
Both men live with Crumpton, though John still has his own flat, and she stays with him once or twice a week.
As with her other two partners – 63-year-old Michael and 73-year-old James – Crumpton interacts with them.